Visual Artist's Dilemma

I took a note, from a digital art book, which states that most artists are visual creatures. What I believe they meant was that artist see things in their head, visions of what is to come or how an idea had blossomed to form a complex picture. The overall big picture that is the end product of whatever they had ponder about.

Once that picture/vision has been shape, it forms to be the goal of the artist, and then it will be his duty to do what is necessary to reach it.

However, the difficulty for the artist is during the need to explain or portray that mental picture to anyone. It requires the help of detailed drawings, specific words descriptions, and other related-media. What's more, if the artist himself may not be that intellectually capable, then it distorts the way he describes them.

One analogy is like when an architect of engineering, who is capable of visualising how a complicated new machine works, but may not necessarily know the right technological terms to explain his creation. Hence, his peers/workers may not be able to comprehend what he is trying to achieve nor can work toward that particular goal.

In the end, the artist does most of the leg work for his own creations, and even if he achieve it, ages will have passed. But then again, he would have been crowned a genius.

Psychedelic

A simple research on brainwaves gave a surprising link to my current sleeping disorder.

Here is a a quick summary:

Beta:
- strongly engaged mind
- mental activities
- arousal
- active debate

Alpha:
- reflect or meditate
- non-arousal
- a walk in a garden

Theta:
- daydream
- can't recall what happen a few mins/secs ago
- tasks so automatic, that can mentally disengage from them
- achieve mental relaxation
- prone to flow of ideas

Delta:
- deep dreamless sleep


What seems to be the case is that since I daydream frequently and often full of ideas, Theta brainwaves are roaming through my mind on most occasion. Due to the this fact, my brainwaves can easily switch to Delta mode causing me to feel sleepy despite the hour of that day. Therefore, providing a vague yet meaningful explanation of my sleeping disorder.

Spirits of the Jungle

4-12 Aug 2010.
Location: Brunei Kampong Batang Duri, Temburung, Brunei Darulsalam,

A period where Man Vs Wild program was running in my life channel. It was my first time ever jungle trekking with camping. Nonetheless, my mind was all prep-up for what was to come. Expecting worst scenarios, the whole journey from point-to-point was appreciable. No major fights, only small arguments. What was the kicker was that I had to be the navigator. Fortunantely, smartalex Bryan was my assistant navigator. A blessing I assure you that. Someone who I can truly work with.

Our team of 18 consisted of; White Azhar, Kampung boy Faisal, Paddington Imran, Wak Imran, A'lvl student Bryan, Silat artist Firdaus, Fashionista Aydil, Sotong pair Chua & Ong, Section buddy Riduan, Joker Haikal, Positive Fahmie, Makjanda Farreze, Floorball player Ozalis, Jap writer Yuji, Whining Muhaimin, FI Azzan, and lastly a happy MEal.

The 2 instrutors; Abang Faisal (OBSG) & Encik Jamil (OBBR).

With our hearts combined, we are the Pateh Tuba!

The 9-days ordeal, though exaggeratedly extreme, shaped part of my life worth noting. The experiences gained left its' mark as the best jungle living ever. The tent set-up was not as hard as I once believed. The trekking was simply superb. The bathe by the open river during a heavy downpour with NSF companions was something you can never buy. Lastly, the food.......was one-of-a-kind; Pure Milo sachets, baked beans with bread, rice dumplings with canned chicken curry, and lastly, the infamous MaggiMee!

One of my childhood ambitions relive itself through this epic minor adventure. Other than embracing mother nature, I learnt that the jungle brings out the inner side of you that we all so often mask from public scrutinies. Amidst desperate times, people bring out the best or worst in them (a new point added to my psychology of human nature). However, to nurture the capability to cope with such character is much harder than I thought. Especially when they may ticked you off to the very skin. I ponder over the question, "Do others do really come before self, or must we take care of ourselves before we can take care of others?"

Ethical & moral dilemmas were subjects I often wonder. Wonder what can be/are the solutions.

Moreover, we also need to be reminded of the things we were once taught, not just discussed & forget and choose not to implement them. The ideas, techniques, moral lessons, etc. are actually more valuable than how they are assume to be. But, most of the time human nature prevails, and often than not, we carry on with our present life and forget.

My advice, capture each special moment through a diary, blog, video, a song played repeatedly at that moment, your freaking brain memory (if you can recall frequently), etc.

When it comes to the jungle, respect mother nature, your peers, and yourself.
Or the spirits may just haunt you.......

Reminiscing YTSS

Heart, Body, Mind & Soul.

The Y21 program that aim to turn YTzens to a holistic student. It imparts its objectives on me recently, as I now try to manipulate the system to cater to my ideals.

The HBMS needs a little bit more touch up here and there before it can be executed. The tweaked system shall aid me in fulfilling that unrealistic organisation of mine. /.\

Dangerous Mind

If you had all the money & assets in the world, a happy family, and most of the things you can ever ask for, what is there to dream of then?

Living the degenerative lifestyle or to party all night long would be boring. To do things that a commoner could only thing of is all too cliche. With such power and financial capabilities, a man's thought would reach a different level of thinking as most of his 'Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs' would have been fulfilled.
 
Sinister plots plaques the mind for total control.
Travel the world in search of hidden treasures and new discoveries.
Manipulate inventions that no man has tried.
To do what was deemed impossible.


Contemplate on this scenario. Contemplate on what can be done. Contemplate...

[GAME] Funny Scenarios

- At least 2 people, must act out humorous scenarios in order to cause the judges to laugh.

- Contestants may use any kind of props or those specify by the judges
- Judges will withold a mouth full of water when contestants doing scenarios
- Contestants that cause most number of judges to discharge their mouth-full of water during their acts, wins the game.
- A time limit may be imposed
- A specify number of acts per group may be imposed

/.\ New School of Thoughts

Sustainable
Define: to undergo, experience, or suffer (injury, loss, etc.); endure without giving way or yielding

Creative
Define: resulting from originality of thought, expression, etc.; imaginative: creative writing

Animateur (french)
Define: Leader; A person or thing that leads in a certain field in terms of excellence, success, etc.

Vision: To make the universe a better place.

Mission: To shape the Man into his best form and specialties, with versatility and leadership capabilities.

Hidden Agenda: Classified

We are The SecCom, We are The Pumper

I didn't expect to be in SCC within 2 weeks. Fast game eh? Now on a pilgrimage to submit my soul to regimentation & discipline. Running, push ups, jumping jacks, more running. The endurance build up is tremendous that IPPT test can be just a breeze.

More to say, clocking below 9m45s for 2.4km was a real personal best. Nonetheless, we need to push the standards and achieve more. In the weeks to come, physical phase going to be more demanding, and I am definitely looking forward to it. Especially, the bunker gears training. It's like weight vest training with comfort paddings. I am feeling, stronger, better, faster already.

Mental research is the most important key point right now. Because right now, I can't climb for shits, but I can run like dogs.

Artist In The Making

I didn't know I was capable of making a trailer worth mentioning. But the achievement calls for a blog post to commemorate my climbing trailer making it to sgclimb website. Here's the shitnitz that was something:

In Here Lies Several Discoveries

Eye of Horus - The evil eye! Be afraid. Be very afraid.
Sacred Geometry Symbols - You never ever realised that maths can be so interesting. If nature was make up of numbers, than being able to predict weather would be a good cause.
Reiki - Naruto chakras secret revealed!
Alchemy Symbols - Imagine living in that century and being scientist. Knn, must know how to draw also.

An Uncertain Grim Future

For what it seems to be a future destine to be full of sorrow, should we choose not to live in leisure? Should we cower behind all those good spirits because we know it would not be that way again?

Right now, the predicament seems likely to persist, but yet, it seems likely to be a fairy tale. So which part of it is true?

To not know the answer is killing the soul inside. Yet, I believe there may still be hope.

Tomorrow's Beginning

"It is the start of a brand new day each day," seems like a very cliche' comment but nonetheless, we ought to remember how we are living our lives at every moment in order to be mindful of our actions. Our undisclosed time is limited, so to take each breath like it was our last generates the kind of feeling you get when you are alive!

Prefer not to complain about trivial matters, and prefer not to be dampen by the spirits within should be principles of life practice daily.

Pause for a moment and just recap how you had lived your life this entire day. Look at the time wasted on negative thoughts or doing things left undone. Does spending that hours in front of a computer truly deliver the happiness you were looking for? Technology, it never fails to capture the minds of lost souls, and virtually trapping them in an illusion of contented hearts.

I wonder how blissful it would be to throw my laptop away and start exploring the frontiers of the world. Sweet surrender.

Tomorrow's beginning is something we should look forward to, not just because it is a brand new day, but it also gives us the chance to start things new.

Time Wasted

On any given free day, we normally spend our times as a bummer. If we choose to, we be going out with friends having fun and doing stupid things. Yes, it builds bond. Bond that either last forever or is just temporary.

But bonds that last forever are those with knowledge, those that you choose to practice. Spending time reading helps to free the mind from narrow thoughts and open it up to undiscovered discoveries. So be selfish not of your time, for it gains meaning with books that may serve you well in the future.

One With Heart

Read this somewhere;

A man who works with his hand, is a labourer.
A man who works with his hand and brain, is a craftmans.
A man who works with his hand, brain and heart, is an artiste.

These short phrases give me an understanding of why I choose to leave the company. I had no heart then to do what I was doing. Selling things aggressively and working from morning till night, I was close to being a workaholic with not much payment. Even worse, the lifestyle it would have lead me did not reap benefits.

Of course it let me to another predicament.Will I ever survive in the working world in the future?

Big Dreams, Small Actions

Those that dare to dream big need to dare take that small actions that lead to their fate first. No matter how much our fantasies run wild, they are still just imaginations if we don't take the right step forward.

My colleague rebuked "Show me you can do it first. I don't believe in such imaginations," when I said, "So I can take off days if I can get the required sales target for 2 weeks?"

His critic makes me ponder, whether are my dreams as such?

Leaps of Faith

Much of us fantasize each day what could have happen if we had taken the other path of our decisions. We see things much greener on the other side once we feel pinch on one side. Hence, we regret our decisions and start to ponder 'what if's.

But it is these leap of faiths that make us who we are. They are the foundations of our being and it is how we shape ourselves presently to it that makes the difference for future outcomes. Decisions do not really affect future outcomes unless that is the way we choose to think. It would be very saddening if someone does believe that decisions affects outcomes greatly, as it generates a very narrow mindset.

I've regretted several times not to have choose the other paths, but only to be reminded by myself that whatever happened have happen, so it was best to focus on something that you can do, rather than something that you can't do.

I just took a leap of faith today at a job interview, and am just hoping for the best! For some things, are best left with destiny.

A Solider's Way

Obeying, without questioning. This statement may very well explain how most military system work. It also explains how two sides of the world can easily collide for the wrong reasons.

Henceforth, I will forever be defiance to such a system in which makes no sense. Where problem can rise at unprecedented moments. Flawed from the beginning, and flawed to the end.

Yet, it exists.

(Post was inspired by the movie, Pan's Labyrinth)

Art

Is define as:
- the quality, production, expression, or realm, according to aesthetic principles, of what is beautiful, appealing, or of more than ordinary significance.
- the principles or methods governing any craft or branch of learning.

So can a person self-proclaim work of art be legitimate though it may not be like by many?

Control of Power

With great power comes great responsibility. The quote couldn't be any more true. Power can be attain easily once you learn a trick or two. But to control it takes alot more effort than to attain it.

The responsibility of making hard right decisions bears within the most powerful men. For they control how the world revolves.

What if you had that much power, what would you do then? Would you even think of the consequences of your actions beforehand, or would you succumb to your emotional needs that serve no greater purposes.

I watch daily as man falls with such ease. Do they not see? Or worst, do they choose not to see? The thought itself fumes me with anger. What if they choose to make the wrong decisions? What do we make of the world then? Feebleminded humans I dub them. I give a mental fight about whether such matters should be worth the thought of, or let it be.

To let it be is to be ignorant of impending circumstances. Circumstances that will tick off any man or cause a mistake gravely regretted.

This 20 decade shall be the year that I hope the Man will choose to make a difference.


I'm starting with the man in the mirror. - Michael Jackson